It’s funny how it doesn't last forever, for most of us the cause for a smile when we are 15 won’t elicit the same response one year later. Tastes of the day change. You need different things to be happy. Enjoying the words of others is crucial. But sometimes those words give you no enjoyment. Sometimes they will. The search for a smile is a two sided game. Played by all, won by many, failed occasionally. You’ll have days where everything can put a smile on your face. There will be other days, weeks where you feel like you’re playing the game alone. You can’t find that combustion which leads to a warm smile on your face or the face of someone else. Being grateful for the low times and the high times. Two sides of the same coin. Happy and sad. Sometimes it’s not really sadness that gets you it’s this beige feeling. The easiest way to explain that feeling would be “not happy”. Not a terrible place to be but it’s a no mans land. This is the contested land where you stand between two choices. You can fall toward one side which is real sadness or walk toward the happy side again. Beginning the walk to the happy side of no mans land is not always possible, what is possible is avoiding the walk toward the sad side. Staying in that neutral place is necessary occasionally. Just drifting like a leaf in the wind is how that place can make you feel, that’s ok. It’s really all ok, as long as you can still think and consider like you are now those are good days. Maybe not great days but good days for many those are really hard to come by.